...and maybe a few Dark Alleys...

[the fresno edition]

This page was founded originally in my Diners subdomain to review one of my favorite types of hang-outs: dirty little diners. It has since mutated into a general review page for dumps and diners around the Fresno area, and has recently joined the DDD family which includes David, Sarah and Trey. We even have a webring now. Thanks to David for the invitation and the header image. Anyone who knows of a place they think belongs here is free to submit a review.

	Avalon Club Avalon is an increadibly comfortable pool hall. There's so many things I love about this place: the increadible variety on their jukebox, the extra-cold pint glasses, the friendly staff, the high-quality pool tables, the drink-friendly smokers' patio, the fact that the place is a basemeent bar - something unique for a flat-lander place like Fresno. The list goes on & on. Amy & I try to hang out there every coupla weeks. It's an increadibly relaxing joint, whether or not you drink or smoke. The camel girl is a ubiquitous presence, and Thursdays are reggae night with Reality Sounds Internatioinal. The crowd is diverse enough to warrant this place on the 'must do' list of any Fresno resident or visitor.
	Club Fred My favorite bar/hang-out/live music venue of all times. All my favorite bands are always playing here, they have the coolest bar staff in the world, and the perfect atmosphere of combination dive/wharehouse bar. Not smelly and good environmental controls. Catch Glenn Delpit Fridays at happy hour, Nate Butler Wednesdays, Football and Open Mic Mondays. They always have live music scheduled. You can check out their web site for their live music schedule, which once-a-month almost always includes such local heroes as the Vultures, Sippy & Old Guzzler, Fastback 69, Superfluid Helium 3, Cattie Ness & the Revenge, and Let's Go Bowling. Another definate must.
	Bobby Salazar's I used to start out Friday nights at Sal's in Tower, but the clieentele has deteriorated over the past year or so, and happy hour is often the distasteful scene of barfights and gangster cruising. A pity, since the beer is ccheap and the food quick and easy.
	Country Fare No biscuits and gravy, but Country Fare has some damn good ethnic breakfast. Alongside piping hot rice and beans they also offer regular daytime Mexican fare and killer omlettes. The tortillas were soft and tasty and everything was served up quickly and efficiently - most likely to better manage the high traffic that this intriguingly popular spot attracts. Country Fare is located on Belmont between Maple and Chestnut. The parking isn't very fun, but it's definately worth searching for a space in order to get a seat at this place...
	Al's Cafe Housed in a converted Wendy's, refreshingly few improvements have been made to the original building, which retains the cheesy pink plether booths and rickety chairs which seem barely able to hold more than 5 stone, but with a refurbished front counter to cater to the need of servers and chefs, rather than minimum-wage fast-food tellers. The service is to die for and the staff is increadibly friendly. Their breakfast specialty is the Cactus Omlette, an interesting conglomeration of veggies and sausage, with lots of cheese. So healthy for someone with high blood pressure like myself... They are primarily an early-riser venue, opening at 6am and closing at 3pm Monday through Saturday. Closed Sundays, as are most good diners 'round town.
	Bob's Big Boy One of the last remaining Bob's Big Boy around. They host classic cars nights, sell gads of merchandise, and preserve all the aesthetic qualities you would expect from a real diner. The fact that the place is accross the street from Tower Records means I pass by it a lot and consequently succumb to the temptation to feast there way more often than I should. Like my other diner trips, this is usually a breakfast menu monopoly for me. The place is located on Fresno's Blackstone Strip, one of the few places not too scary to warrant a venture out of the safety of Downtown or Tower.
	Chicken Pie Shop If anyone is thinking of making a sleazy film set in the 70s, get in touch with me and you'll have a willing investor, provided you shoot some of it at Chicken Pie Shop. This place is so increadibly sexy it blows me away. The waitresses are all hair-netted and sweet, few younger than 45. The food is increadibly greasy and the portions are huge. The omlettes are worth their weight in gold. They actually only charge about $6.00 per plate, which means the place is an increadibly good deal as well. I haven't really experimented that much with their non-breakfast menu, but I'm sure just about any of their faire is adequate for a hangover recovery, weeknight binge or random gluttony attack. Located in Fresno's Tower District, there are few other places worthy of my Saturday mornings in walking distance. They are only open 8-8 Monday through Friday and 8-3 Saturday, so travelers make sure you arrive early! Before you leave, it's imperative that you take a snap-shot of the "3 cocks on a wall". They're the cocks with feathers. You and your dirty mind.
	Klein's Truck Stop Located at the Herndon exit on Route 99, Kleins is one of the best diners in the Fresno area. The waitress that served me my first time there was named Ginger, so I knew everything would be alright... Their menu is HUGE, too. Six pages, and no crowding photos. They have everything from cold cereal to prime rib, and everything is dirt cheap. The New York steak dinner was only $12.95. It's also a very large place, and if you miss the major meal crowds you pretty much have it all to yourself. The walls are covered with all manner of random decorations, from sports memorabilia to drag racer photos. An increadibly comfortable place to just hang out. The serving staff don't try to be chatty or cutesy, and they kept my coffee cup full. The food is also no-nonsense. No bells and whistles, but it's tasty as one would expect. The immense variety of the menu is a plus, since you never have to get stuck on one thing. I think I could go there every week for the rest of my life and not run out of new stuff to try. I hear they're open 24-hours, but I have yet to test this by actually looking it up or going there odd hours.